Michael Garofalo (MG): Hey there, StoryCorps listeners. It’s Michael Garofalo here, and we’ve got a StoryCorps extra for you today. It’s just a single story that we wanted you to hear as we head into this weekend where students across the country are going to be marching in the streets of Washington, D.C. and elsewhere. And these demonstrations are part of a nationwide effort after the Parkland shooting to try to end mass shootings in schools. This conversation came in recently and we’re gonna play it for you now.

It’s between a mother and son, and they’re talking about the active shooter drills that the kid has to do in his 5th grade classroom. Dezmond Floyd is 10 years old. He goes to public school in Houston, Texas, and he’s speaking with his mom, Tanai Benard, at StoryCorps.

Dezmond Floyd (DF): What emergency drills did you have as you were growing up in school?

Tanai Benard (TB): Fire drills and tornado drills and that was it. So can you tell me exactly what happens in active shooter drills?

DF: The teacher is supposed to lock the door, turn the lights off, and push this big desk behind the door. And the first time I did an active shooter drill I saw her having a hard time with it so I decided to come help her because if she doesn’t get the desk on the door in time, the intruder can open it.

TB: So what do you do next after you push the table?

DF: The class is supposed to stand on the back wall but I decided to stand in front of the class because I want to take the bullet and save my friends.

TB: So does your teacher ask you to stand in front of the class?

DF: No. My life matters but, it’s kind of like, there’s one person that can come home to the family or there can be 22 people that come home to a family.

TB: Do you know why it’s hard for me to accept that?

DF: Because I’m such a young age, I shouldn’t really be giving my life up, like, you shouldn’t have to worry about that.

TB: Right. If there’s any a time that I want you to be selfish, it’s then. I need you to come home.

So would you still stand in front of your friends even with me telling you not to?

DF: Yes. I get that you would want me to come home but it’s really not a choice that you can make, it’s a choice that I have to make.

TB: I see now that there’s nothing I could say that would change your mind. I just hope that it never comes to that.

DF: Talking about this makes me feel sad but you raised a good person.

TB: And this is why I can’t have the conversation with you. You keep saying  things like that and I’m speechless. You’re 10 and you’re that 10-year-old who doesn’t clean their room and there is no handbook for this. This is why the conversation always ends between you and I in dead silence because I’m a mother and I don’t know what to say.

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MG: That’s Tanai Benard with her 10 year old son Dezmond, a 5th grader in Houston, Texas. Tanai also teaches 7th and 8th graders at a local public school.

That’s it for this extra. We’ll be back with a full episode next week. ‘Til then, I’m Michael Garofalo. Thanks for listening.