Surinder Singh left India in the mid-1960s to pursue a career in education. He raised his family in Canada and the U.S., but as practicing Sikhs, they faced a number of challenges.
At StoryCorps in San Francisco, he sat down to speak with his eldest son, Rupinder Singh.
Broadcast on NPR’s Morning Edition on August 10, 2012.
Surinder Singh (SS): When I came in 1966, nobody knew about who a Sikh was. For them, I came out as if from a zoo or a museum. I looked so different.
Rupinder Singh (RS): One of the memories I always have is being bullied when I was in kindergarten. It was recess, and I do remember being called some names. And I left school and just walked home. I must have been five years old. I walked in the door and surprised mom.
It just became part of growing up for me that this was going to happen wherever I went to school.
The worst of it was really the 8th grade, 9th grade, just because it turned into something a little bit more physical where people were grabbing at my turban or pulling on it, um, as I walked the halls. So I used to rush from class to class and uh, hope I’d get through without being touched.
I had a hard time opening myself up to other people because I didn’t know who would be my friend one day and change their mind the next day. And um, it was very hard for me to give my trust to people.
SS: Since we are different, even at this age, I still get bullied sometimes.
RS: When you take walks every afternoon, it’s always a thought of mine, like, you know, if someone’s going to say something in a passing car—you never know about any kind of lunatic or if somebody is going to do something.
SS: Yeah, it does happen. But you have to maintain your strength, and you have to try to learn not to give up.
Once when I was desperately needing a job, they had hired me, but after two, three days, I was told that, “Mr. Singh you have to remove your turban … you have to look like us.”
I said, ”Mr … I won’t do it.” And I gave up the job right away. He was very surprised, but I was not willing to give in.
RS: Yeah and I think I’ve kind of inherited that myself. Removing my turban, cutting my hair was never even a consideration for me. I never thought of that as an option.
Looking back, given all the experiences you’ve had, do you think that it’s possible to live as a Sikh in this country.
SS: Oh yeah. Most of the people that you deal with are really very good. There are a few black sheep, and sometimes they spoil the flock, but uh, on the whole, I do believe that there is more good than evil around.
When Deborah Wei and her family moved to the Philadelphia suburbs in the 1960’s, they were the only Asian family in their neighborhood. Deborah remembers how her mother made their new surroundings feel like home.
