Jethro Soudant (JS) and Shasti O’Leary-Soudant (SOS)

JS: I remember the most scared I was, was when you were diagnosed. That was frightening, and I remember you know bawling due to not knowing what lie ahead for you, and us. I didn’t cope with it as well as I could have.

SOS: I think you coped pretty well considering. I mean, you never let me see any of it. The happiest and the worst day of my life were the same day. It was pretty late in the Chemo – I think it was probably about five months into it – I was getting really sick every time. They had to take me into the back room because they couldn’t give it to me with all the other patients. The moment that we walked off the elevator, I started feeling nauseous, and then we walked into the back room. The moment that the needle punctured the skin in the port, I threw up and you were ready for it. You, like, caught it, and I soiled myself. I peed. I couldn’t control any of my bodily functions. I was crying hysterically, and you said something that made me laugh, and I still can’t remember what it was. You were just looking at me, you were looking at me right in the eye, and you said something really funny. It was something about how I looked, or, it was like you were just radiating love just out of your face at me. It was like shining a light on me. I felt like I was looking into the sun. It was the most incredible moment of my life, because I had no doubt. I knew you loved me. I knew that if I died, it would never stop. Cause it was just — really, you can’t think of being in any worse shape than I was at that exact second. Except that I was laughing. And all of a sudden I just felt like no matter what happened everything was going to be fine.

JS: It’s when you kind of broke. You finally submitted. It was probably the lowest point, but then it became the highest point simultaneously.

SOS: I guess I just sort of let it happen from that point on. I let you take care of me. But that was a long slog. Boy, that was a fight.