Ernesto Rodriguez and Sebastian Rodriguez

Puerto Rico native First Lieutenant Ernesto Rodriguez enlisted in the Marine Corps in 2002 as an opportunity to serve, see the world, and better his English. In 2004, the year after the start of Operation Iraqi Freedom, he was married, and in January 2005, his first child, Sebastian, was born. Later that year he was deployed to Iraq.

While he loved life in the military with the security and stability it offered, and welcomed the opportunity to put his training to use, being at war limited his contact with his family and he missed them immensely. Having seen other service members watch their children “grow up in pictures,” he was determined not to let that happen to him.

In 2009, resolved not to spend any more time away from his family, which now included his daughter, Elsasofia, Ernesto retired from the Marines.

Returning home, he found the life he arrived to was not the same one he had left behind before going off to war. His children barely knew him, steady employment was difficult to find, he and his wife separated, and for a period of time he was homeless. His life was in a tailspin.

Ernesto came to StoryCorps with Sebastian (pictured together above), 11, to talk for the first time about what it was like for him to go off to war, and his attempts to keep his family together after his return.

Originally aired June 17, 2016, on NPR’s Morning Edition.

Donna Engeman and Nicole McKenna

In 1981, when she was 20 years old, Donna Engeman enlisted in the United States Army. Prior to joining, Donna had not only never set foot outside of the country, but she had never even left the state of Minnesota.

While stationed in Germany, she met Long Island native John Engeman. Living in the barracks, they had what soldiers often refer to as a “barracks romance”—a fling that does not last long. But Donna and Sergeant Engeman quickly fell in love and in February 1983 they married.

Months after the wedding, Donna, pregnant with their first child, a boy, and believing herself to be a better spouse than soldier, left the Army and returned to the states to raise Patrick.

John remained in the military and in January 2006, as part of Operation Iraqi Freedom, he was deployed to Baghdad. On May 14, 2006, an improvised explosive device detonated near his Humvee during a combat operation killing him and a fellow soldier.

Chief Warrant Officer John W. Engeman is buried in Arlington National Cemetery. Donna and John’s son, Patrick, is currently an Army major who has been deployed overseas four times.

Donna came to StoryCorps with their daughter, Nicole McKenna (pictured together at left), to share stories of John as a young husband and father.

Originally aired May 26, 2016, on NPR’s Weekend Edition Saturday.

Top photo of Donna Engeman courtesy of Slade Walters/IMCOM, U.S. Army.

Photo of Donna and John at a 2002 Military Ball courtesy of Donna Engeman.

Suzanne Lynch, Patricia Mishler, and Janette Lynch

In 1978, Patricia Mishler left her home in England and moved to the United States after marrying an American. The mother of two daughters—Suzanne, 13, and Janette, 11—her family first lived in Indiana before eventually resettling in Nashville, Tennessee.

Patricia, now 73 years old, was diagnosed about a year and a half ago with ALS. Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, also known as Lou Gehrig’s disease, destroys motor neurons, the nerve cells that control muscle movement in the brain and spinal cord leading to progressive paralysis and eventual death. Most people with ALS die from respiratory failure, usually within three to five years from the onset of symptoms. (According to the National Institutes of Health, only about 10% of those with ALS survive for 10 years or more.)

A grandmother to more than a dozen grandchildren, Patricia once spent much of her free time pursuing favorite hobbies like gardening, sewing, and cooking. But since her diagnosis in October 2014, she has been unable to enjoy them any longer.

Suzanne (above left) and Janette (above right) recently brought their mother to StoryCorps to talk to her about what it’s been like for her to live with ALS, and also her thoughts on knowing that the disease will one day take her life.

Originally aired May 6, 2016, on NPR’s Morning Edition.

Top Photo: Suzanne, Patricia, and Janette (left to right) in England on holiday in 1976 courtesy of Janette Lynch.

Zeek Taylor and Dick Titus

Dick Titus and Zeek Taylor met in Memphis, Tennessee, in 1971. Zeek was openly gay having already come out to his friends and family, but Dick was still in the closet with the added burden of having his family living close by.

In order for the two of them to be together, they decided to leave Memphis and move to Fayetteville, Arkansas, a city that would put some distance between Dick and his family, and where he knew he could find work as an electrician. But when they got there, Dick was convinced that he would have to continue to remain closeted after encountering homophobia on job sites, leading him to believe that he would lose work if anyone discovered that he was gay.

In order to protect Dick (pictured on the right), they decided to buy two homes—one to live in together and another to use as a dummy house for Dick in case any of his fellow workers wanted to come by at the end of the day. They also established a code in case they ran into any of the people Dick worked with while they were out together. Dick’s colleagues called him “Oscar,” so when they were in public and heard someone use the name, Zeek (pictured on the left) would pretend that they did not know each other.

Today, Dick is out to his friends and family. They came to StoryCorps to recall their journey from owners of multiple homes for 13 years, to married owners of a single home together in Eureka Springs, Arkansas.

Originally aired March 4, 2016, on NPR’s Morning Edition.

Susan Kaphammer and Joshua Myers

Joshua Myers, 29, was born with Down syndrome. Growing up, he often felt overwhelmed by his condition and struggled with depression.

Once, when he was a teenager, Joshua attempted suicide by walking into the middle of a busy intersection, but was saved by a passing motorist.

For his mother, Susan Kaphammer, it was difficult to watch her son suffer and know that there was very little that she could do to make his pain go away.

With those tough times behind them, Joshua and Susan came to StoryCorps to discuss what he now loves about his life, and his dreams for the future.

Originally aired February 19, 2016, on NPR’s Morning Edition.

Benny Smith and Christine Ristaino

In 2015, 11-year-old Benny Smith began feeling strange sensations in his body that felt like small electrical jolts. Soon after, the jolts began lasting longer and growing more intense—Benny was suffering with grand mal seizures (a condition characterized by loss of consciousness and muscle spasms).

The seizures would come at various times, including during the school day where the resulting falls led to multiple concussions.

Often, his mother, Christine Ristaino, would have to pick him up in the middle of the day and bring him home since his condition made it unsafe for him to be in a classroom. Soon after the beginning of sixth grade, Benny was forced to remain at home, being taught by a tutor. An outgoing social kid who loved being around his friends, to him this was one of the most difficult parts of the illness.

In January 2016, his condition began to improve and he was able to return to the classroom. Benny and his mom, Christine, came to StoryCorps to mark the occasion and discuss how he has lived with the seizures.

Originally aired February 12, 2016, on NPR’s Morning Edition.

Octavius Smiley-Humphries, Carole Smiley and Seth Smiley-Humphries

Hoping to meet someone special, in 2010 Seth Smiley decided to give online dating a try. Soon after posting his profile, Octavius Humphries reached out to him and they began an email correspondence.

Despite their age difference—Seth is 19 years older than Octavius—they immediately hit it off, bonding over their shared search for “commitment, consistency, and (a) connection.”

Eventually they met in person, going on their first date on Christmas Eve. Unsure of Octavius’ plans for the holiday, Seth invited him to dinner the next night at his family’s Atlanta home. Octavius, who was still grieving the deaths of his parents, had, unbeknownst to Seth, planned on spending the holiday alone. Instead, he reluctantly accepted Seth’s invitation.

At StoryCorps, Octavius (above left) and Seth (above right), along with Seth’s mother, Carole Smiley, sat down to remember their first Christmas together, as well as a more recent memorable holiday event.

Originally aired December 25, 2015, on NPR’s Morning Edition.

Above photo: Seth, Octavius, and their son Julian (photo courtesy of the Smiley-Humphries family).

StoryCorps 449: Lessons in Love

In this podcast, we look back on the early days of the AIDS epidemic, when little was known about the disease including just how far-reaching and destructive it would become.

In our first story, we hear from Stefan Lynch Strassfeld. Growing up in San Francisco in the late 70s and early 80s, Stefan was raised by his gay father, Michael Lynch, and his stepfather, Bill Lewis (top photo second from right). Surrounded by a large network of his fathers’ friends, Stefan referred to his extended family as “his aunties.” Beginning in 1982, Stefan watched a number of those he was closest to die from AIDS. He came to StoryCorps with his friend, Beth Teper (below), to remember how the disease devastated his world.

Stefan later became the first director of COLAGE, a national organization that connects people who have lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer parents.

Our second story brings us to the South. Ruth Coker Burks was a young mother in her early 20s when the AIDS epidemic hit her home state of Arkansas. Despite having no medical training, Ruth took it upon herself to care for those suffering from the disease when their families, and even trained medical professionals, abandoned them.

Ruth estimates that she cared for nearly a thousand people since the early 1980s, with one of those being Paul Wineland’s partner. Ruth and Paul (above) sat down for StoryCorps to talk about her experience visiting a friend at a Little Rock hospital where one of the state’s early AIDS patients lay dying.

Not all the people Ruth helped care for were abandoned. Over the years, she met many people who stayed with their loved ones. In our next story, Jim Harwood (above), whose son died of AIDS, reconnects at StoryCorps with Ruth more than a decade after they last spoke.

In our final story, we hear from Reverend Eric Williams. In 1991 in Kansas City, Missouri, he was a young pastor who had just taken charge of his own church when he received a phone call from a funeral home asking him to bury a gay man who had died from AIDS. His first reaction was to refuse. But as he told his colleague Jannette Berkley-Patton (below) at StoryCorps, “everything good that I have been able to accomplish has started with some kind of a burden. And AIDS burdened me. So reluctantly, I did the funeral.”

According to Rev. Williams, the experience of meeting the boy’s family changed him and since that time he has devoted himself to ministering to people with AIDS and their families, as well as educating others about the disease.

For more information about HIV/AIDS click here.

Like the music in this episode? Support the artists:
“Lola” by Podington Bear from the album Thoughtful
“Repose” by Podington Bear from the album Tender
“Trist” by Podington Bear from the album Duets
“Genius and the Thieves” by Eluvium from the album An Accidental Memory in the Case of Death
“The Temperature of the Air on the Bow of the Kaleetan” by Chris Zabriskie from the album Undercover Vampire Policeman

Ericka Naegle and Walter Naegle

On the heels of a historic Supreme Court ruling that upholds the right of LGBTQ people to marry, we look to the late 1970s—a time where this week’s ruling on marriage equality was unimaginable.

Back then, the iconic civil rights leader Bayard Rustin (left) and his partner, Walter Naegle (right), a man decades his junior, fell in love. They were together for many years.

As Bayard was getting older, they decided to formalize their relationship in the only way that was possible for gay people at the time–Rustin adopted Walter Naegle.

Here, Walter tells his niece, Ericka (pictured above, left), what it was like to fall in love with Bayard, and the unconventional decision they made to protect their union.

Originally aired June 28, 2015, on NPR’s Weekend Edition.

Photo courtesy of Walter Naegle.

Sandra Sowder and Marcia Sutton

Sandra Sowder (left) and Marcia Sutton (right) met in a small town outside of Huntsville, Alabama.

Over time, they fell in love. When they made their relationship public, their worlds turned upside down.

The couple sat down together at StoryCorps to talk about what happened next.

Originally aired September 21, 2014, on NPR’s Weekend Edition Sunday.